The depth of value of a true Wife: Submission in Marriage
Wife’s Value? The value of a wife/ wife’s value is not only found in her beauty, her job title, or how well she can hold her wine in social settings. No. That’s the illusion sold to weak men and foolish women. A wife’s value lies also in her character, her submission, and her unshakeable loyalty to a man worthy of leading a family.
Let’s set this straight: not all wives are equal, and many women in “marriages” today are not truly wives in the biblical, spiritual, or practical sense. Some are undercover rebels, emotionally flippant squatters merely enjoying benefits without ever embracing the sacrifice that real marriage demands. Some marriages, frankly, are not marriages in God’s eyes—just glorified cohabitation arrangements laced with legal convenience and societal performance.
But I won’t waste ink on the value of just any woman who goes by “wife.” This piece is about the good wife—the rare hardwood, not the common softwood. I’ll speak briefly on her value, particularly in submission, and let my life—our Trott Bailey Family life—be the continuing scroll of evidence for those who have eyes to see.
Wife’s Value Displayed. A living example is Sher Trott Bailey-My Life Is Proof Enough
For those curious readers who demand receipts, they’re in full public display. Our lived life—The Trott Bailey Family—is a breathing documentary. You can watch the living value of a wife.You can see it in our love, our unity, the excellence of our children, our decisions, and our world-shaping vision. What is not seen, what is not captured is even more awesome. When your living such a victorious and fulfilling life, who has time to capture everything?
Go ahead, see for yourself on Trott Bailey Family Oasis Videos &1 Drop a Wife’s Value:
- Our humble beginnings: K.B. & Sher, two lights recognizing each other in the dark.
- Where we are now: Big King & World Ruler.
- Where we are going: Builders of the new earth, authors of a new civilization.
We are not just speaking truth—we are living it out loud.
The Trigger Word: Submission
Submission. That dreaded word for many modern women. Feminism trained them to flinch. The mere suggestion of submitting to a man sends them into frothing fits.
But let me explain a wife’s value, let me explain what submission in marriage truly means:
“I submit my whole mind, soul, and body to the service of my husband, in our shared agreement which is our marriage, and toward our unified goal of bringing all things good—love, peace, honor, joy, wealth, and wisdom—into our family, especially for our children and their children.
I submit to the superior physical strength and godly positioning of the man, he is the forward facing stalwart for our family, our shield. He takes the brunt of the beatings and mental & physical battles for our family, hence as his wife it is my duty to make sure that myself and our household are their to support him fully. I acknowledge that even if I am equally or even superior in mental dexterity on mutual subjects, as he is superior over me in many other subject areas, I the woman get worn out much quicker than my husband/ lose interest and I usually just want to go back to being taken care of and take a swim (These are personal examples). I have joined my life to the most admirable man possible, in my estimation for my heart, for our children and I am not put off by the idea of submitting to him.“
Submission also has a second meaning, it means as his right hand support, I am there to submit proposals, perspectives, ingenuitive ideas and thought processes to ease his burdens, to placate negative emotions and open his eyes to other ways/routes to our goals. While I cannot keep up with his physical stamina or even mental( for. E.g. while I can match Big King mentally in terms of intelligence, he is most definitely not sensitive and emotionally driven in many subject areas or life happenings that would rile me up or sadden me down -especially when it comes to anything happening with our children. I submit to my husband as his wife to where he can use the level of natural talents and cultivated talents that I have built on, to offer strategies, ideas, new pursuits etc, to his better judgement, for him to ponder on and make the final decisions for the good of the family”
That’s not slavery. That’s not oppression. That’s intelligent delegation, righteous order, and divine structure. That is a wife’s value.
A wise wife doesn’t compete with her husband—she complements & completes him. It makes no sense for two oxen yoked together to be pulling in opposite directions. Rather, it is best to plow forward in unity. That is a wife’s value – to help.
She submits not because she’s less. She submits because she sees the godly position he’s been given. She recognizes him as the family’s shield, the frontliner, the one whose chest meets the arrow before it even reaches the gate. If he is the sword, she is the sheath. If he is the tree, she is the root system. That is a wife’s value – to help.
Even if a wife possesses equal or greater mental dexterity in certain subjects, she understands that a good man’s capacity is designed to carry more for longer, not just in muscle but in mental endurance. He doesn’t crack under pressure like she might when something happens to the kids. And that’s okay. That’s why she submits her proposals, her insights, her ideas—and lets the Captain decide the best route. Submission isn’t silence—it’s wisdom in motion.
Submission in marriage when it comes to the Holy Spirit: This is for the rare few, those who understand will know what I’m talking about here:
The presence/infilling or complete submission to the power, leading and directions of the Holy Spirit will take you so far and make life as a wife and mother so easy. There will be times in your life as a wife and mother when you will feel frustrated, and you will face moments of inconsiderateness from your husband and your children ( and you will be inconsiderate in return at times too, your human). However these emotions, these few occurrences are fleeting, and rather than indulging in any self pitying thoughts, recount all your self victories, your children’s victories, your husband’s victories and your family victories as a whole family. Once your operating in God’s purpose for your life, you can have only victories, things can only work out for your good, even things that seem bad on the surface.
My dear daughters and my future daughters-in-law, there will be seasons when you need to rest and reflect, and pursue your various purposes as you change. The Holy Spirit will be with you, in you, leading you and comforting you through all these phases. For example: I, your mother, Sher Trott Bailey, have been called to be the Ruler of the world alongside your father, Big King K.B. Yet will this be all that I ever do, no! Before, during and after we have organized and beautified the world and handed over the Kingdoms to you, our kids, there will be other things I’m interested in doing, Meanwhile, presently, i still have to bake a chocolate cake and cook some food for Big King and I love to design new fashions for the kingdoms, I love to think up ideas for passing our long lives happily on the earth. I desire to give God and Heaven a good sportsman like competition on whether Earth is more beautiful or Heaven more beautiful ( you know God gets bored, we got to perk him up, keep Him in shape, get him to use even just 1 % of his power, make him a bit jealous so maybe he will change out the floors in heaven, and it’s citizens will get competitive and say ” ok Sher we see you, we are impressed with what your doing on earth, so we had to change up our wardrobes up here 😁🥰🥰).
While all these pursuits are enjoyable to me, I still have a body that gets tired, that loses sleep as a new baby comes along. However, my daughters, as you learn and progress in managing your household, you will find solutions from the Holy Spirit to make your life easy and to seek your peace. He will give you the smarts and courage to make the changes, have the hard conversations necessary to edify your family.
Submission Is a Gift
There’s a second layer to submission that most people overlook: it’s not just surrender, it’s support through strategy. A good wife submits:
- Ideas
- Warnings
- Inspiration
- Comfort
- Perspective
But she doesn’t undermine. She doesn’t insult him in public, mock his leadership, or “punish” him with passive aggression. No, she sharpens him behind closed doors, then stands proudly beside him in public.
She doesn’t submit because she is weak. She submits because her husband is worthy, and she is wise. That is a wife’s value – to help use her wisdom to make life easier for her family.
Why Many Wives Fail at Submission
Let’s talk plainly. Many of you chose the wrong man because of wrong motives. However, you have now made the vows, don’t try to wiggle out of them now. Simply make the best of it and learn to love your husband. This is possible once you sincerely lay the matter before God for help and have no secret longings in your heart over other men, like a whore, or busying yourself comparing your husband to other men.
Many women “submit” only as long as things are going their way. As long as the man is performing according to their shallow metrics:
- Job title ✔
- Salary ✔
- Social image ✔
But let that man lose his job. Let public shame touch his name. Suddenly, their “submission” gets swapped for complaints, disrespect, and withdrawal.
That’s not a wife. That’s a groupie who turned sour.
Wife’s Value? The wife‘s value is in her ability to submit even through difficulty. She has pre-qualified her husband’s leadership through character, not cosmetics. And because she chose him wisely, she stays loyal even when the storms hit.
As for me, I was spiritually told: “This is your husband. Marry this man. Have his children.”
And I obeyed. Because everything in him radiated true leadership. His action. His word. His consistency.
It took me three days to sleep after meeting him—my soul was on fire.
But even with that kind of spiritual confirmation, I remained watchful.
That’s how real queens move. They don’t get fooled by flattery and flash. They look for hardwood. For solid captains worthy of loyalty.
Hardwood vs. Softwood. Wife’s Value?
Softwood pretends. Softwood is performative. Softwood folds under pressure.
But hardwood? Hardwood is tested. Hardwood sacrifices. Hardwood is the reason a man wakes up and says, “I will die for this woman, and I will conquer the world for our children.”
Ladies, ask yourself: Wife’s Value? Are you hardwood or softwood?
Men, ask yourselves: Wife’s Value? Did you marry a woman who adds to your peace or subtracts from your power?
FAQ: The Value of a Wife. Wife’s Value?
1. Is submission outdated in modern marriages?
No. It’s timeless. Divine structure doesn’t expire. It only gets ignored by cultures that self-destruct.
2. Can a wife be intelligent and still submit?
Yes. Submission isn’t stupidity. It’s strategy. Smart wives submit because they know what’s at stake.
3. What if the husband isn’t worthy of submission?
Then he shouldn’t have been chosen. Women must evaluate men before marriage, not during.
4. Should a wife blindly obey her husband?
No. Submission includes perspective and input. But final authority—especially in key matters—rests with the Captain.
5. Can submission be mutual?
Yes, in love and support. But in final decision-making, God placed that burden on the man. Someone has to be the shield.
6. What makes a man worthy of submission?
Integrity. Consistency. Vision. Responsibility. Faith. Wisdom. Sacrifice. Leadership. Peace under pressure.
7. What happens when a wife refuses to submit?
Chaos. Confusion. Power struggle. Emotional instability. Eventually, the spiritual corrosion of the household.
8. Does submission mean the wife has no voice?
Absolutely not. It means her voice is trusted and respected—then passed through the filter of his final judgment.
9. Can a marriage survive without submission?
Only in mediocrity or dysfunction. True greatness in a family demands order and harmony.
10. What if a wife submits, but the husband abuses that authority?
That’s no longer leadership. That’s tyranny. A man who violates trust forfeits his spiritual authority and will answer to God.
Final Word: Submission Isn’t Slavery. It’s Strategy. Wife’s Value?
The value of a wife isn’t in how many inspirational quotes she reposts on Instagram. It’s in how she handles structure, sacrifice, and submission in real life.
And just as not all wood can be used to build a throne, not all women can be called a wife.
If you are a wife or preparing to be one, stop measuring yourself by modern metrics.
Instead, ask your husband—or future husband:
“Do I multiply your peace or your problems?”
“Do I sharpen your vision or blur your focus?”
“Do I offer submission as support, or do I wear rebellion as independence?”
Be hardwood. Be capable. Be strategic.
Be a wife of value.
